Chapter 63 – Go! Go Wreak Havoc!
“Fatty, is the wind in your Zhunan always this strong?”
Lu Jing leaned against the window lattice, looking down.
The various towers, terraces, and halls of the Mountain Sea Pavilion were arranged from high to low, with roofs of all shapes: sharp gabled roofs, curved hip-and-gable roofs, nine-ridged hall roofs with extended eaves, and conical spired pagodas with jeweled tops, all staggered and uneven. The roofing materials varied, from glazed tiles in a riot of colors to dark cloth tiles with rough-hewn rafters, and even gilded bronze sheets laid out in a checkerboard pattern, each with a different luster.
It was like a mountain of palaces and a sea of pavilions floating in mid-air.
“Nonsense,” Zuo Yuesheng said, pushing him aside. “If the wind blew like this every day, how would we live?”
The Wuye Pavilion they were in was located in the upper part of this architectural mountain, offering a view that took in most of the Mountain Sea Pavilion. They could see senior brothers and sisters in pale gold cloaks carrying storm lanterns, quickly leaving their residences to head to the various streets of the city, the continuous and majestic sea walls, or to patrol along the trestle paths and covered bridges.
Zuo Yuesheng finally felt a little relieved.
The Mountain Sea Pavilion had an “Yinglong Division.”
The division was split into two parts. One, clad in silver cloaks, consisted of outer pavilion disciples with lower cultivation levels. They were numerous and responsible for escorting fishermen back to port when the sea horn sounded. The other, clad in golden robes, consisted of inner pavilion disciples with higher cultivation levels. They were fewer in number and responsible for patrols and vigilance. Wherever the tide’s gloom grew too heavy and bred filth, they would slay it on the spot. If the thunder was too fierce and the rain too heavy, threatening to destroy houses and walls, they would divert the storm and rain.
It wasn’t the first time the sea horn had sounded in Zhunan; a complete set of response measures had long been established.
In the past, when the raging waves locked down the sea, it would last for two or three months, and everyone had gotten used to it. Although this lockdown had come suddenly, under the orderly arrangements of the Mountain Sea Pavilion disciples, the cultivators and residents in Zhunan gradually calmed down. Some cultivators with decent cultivation levels who had lived in Zhunan for a long time, regardless of their sect, joined the Mountain Sea Pavilion disciples in patrolling the streets, clearing the drains, and opening the river gates.
Zuo Yuesheng gazed at the surface of the Tranquil Sea for a while longer and saw the fishing boats moored one after another near the Black Tortoise, with no signs of commotion.
Thank goodness, that Azure Batfish must have been an accident.
The door curtain lifted, and a wind chime tinkled.
Lou Jiang walked in.
“What did the old man say?” Zuo Yuesheng asked, turning his head.
“The Pavilion Master wants you to stay in the Wuye Pavilion for the next few days and not go out,” Lou Jiang replied.
“That’s it?”
“That’s it.”
Zuo Yuesheng couldn’t believe it. “He didn’t say anything about the Azure Batfish?”
Lou Jiang shook his head.
“Isn’t this going too far?” Lu Jing tilted his head over. “We were the ones who encountered the Azure Batfish! If it weren’t for… uh, if it weren’t for…” He faltered, glossing over the certain someone he didn’t know how to address. “We’d be rowing a boat in a fish’s stomach right now. As the parties involved, we have… right, we have the right to know!”
He showed off the new term he had learned from Young Master Chou as if it were a prize.
“Right! Exactly!” Zuo Yuesheng slapped his thigh. “We have the right to know! Where’s the old man? I want to see him!”
“…”
What on earth was a ‘right to know’!
Lou Jiang expertly suppressed his sense of speechlessness and explained calmly and steadily, “The Black Tortoise has suddenly entered hibernation. The Pavilion Master is currently settling the various merchants in the nine cities and needs to send elders to investigate the Tranquil Sea. The situation is urgent and his schedule is packed, so he is temporarily unable to see the Young Pavilion Master. However, he has assigned Elder Tao to come over. She should be here shortly.”
As he spoke, he subconsciously glanced at a certain person in the Wuye Pavilion.
Suddenly, Lou Jiang froze. “Where’s Elder Chou?”
“Isn’t Young Master Chou lounging on the soft couch?” Lu Jing answered casually. He looked back and was also stunned. “Huh?! Where’s Chou Bodeng? He was just there a moment ago!”
The group was in the sea-gazing pavilion of Wuye Pavilion. Half-Diviner was treating his fall injuries—he had apparently fallen more than once—and Monk Budu was counting his silver. The soft couch by the window, which had been occupied, was now empty. Not only was Chou Bodeng gone, but Shi Wuluo had also vanished.
Lou Jiang’s face paled in alarm.
In his mind, this Little Martial Ancestor of Taiyi was tantamount to a walking fuse for major incidents.
Think about it. He had been undercover in Fu City for over a year and hadn’t found any concrete clues. The day after Taiyi’s Little Martial Ancestor arrived, Fu City was blood-sacrificed overnight, former City Diviner Ge Qing ignited the heavenly fire, the Miasma Moon city opened, and a High God descended. And then think about this: the day after Taiyi’s Little Martial Ancestor arrived in Ru City, Zhou Ziyan activated the illusion array, turned against his master Elder Tao Rong, and a century of bitter resentment erupted, leading the entire city down the wrong path. Now, counting on his fingers, today happened to be the second day of Taiyi’s Little Martial Ancestor’s arrival in Zhunan. And coincidentally, it was on this very day that the supposedly extinct Azure Batfish appeared in Zhunan’s Tranquil Sea, and the sea-suppressing Black Tortoise entered hibernation ahead of schedule.
At this critical juncture, Chou Bodeng had suddenly disappeared!
Along with a certain nameless fellow who could contend with a High God from Heaven Beyond Heavens!
It was like the setup in a storybook, right before the hero is about to turn the world upside down.
Lou Jiang reviewed the worlds Taiyi’s Little Martial Ancestor had overturned. In Fu City, City Diviner Ge Qing was disgraced and is still kneeling before the divine tree to this day. In Ru City, City Diviner Zhou Ziyan committed suicide to atone for his crimes, and the Mountain Sea Pavilion struck his name from their records.
Zhunan had no City Diviner; the Pavilion Master governed the city.
Could it be that this “City Diviner Killer,” Taiyi’s Little Martial Ancestor, was about to be promoted to “Sect Master Killer”?
Lou Jiang broke out in a cold sweat, his heart pounding. He was about to rush out and gather men to search.
“Don’t tell me he fell into the sea?” Lu Jing, oblivious to his thoughts, searched the sea-gazing pavilion but couldn’t find him. He leaned out the window and shouted down, “Young Master Chou! Young Master Chou! Should we come fish you out? Or throw you a rope—ouch!”
A small piece of gray tile hit the back of his head.
“Fatty Zuo, is this pavilion of yours in disrepair? A tile fell off,” Lu Jing said, rubbing the back of his head as he looked up. “Huh? Chou Bodeng?! When did you get up there?”
Hearing this, Lou Jiang leaned half his body out to look up. He saw Chou Bodeng sitting on the ridge of the sea-gazing pavilion’s conical roof, his fingers fiddling with the Wind-Vane Bronze Bird on the finial. That certain nameless young man was also on the roof.
Lou Jiang breathed a sigh of relief.
Right, the Young Pavilion Master and he were cronies. A “Sect Master Killer” situation was unlikely to happen.
“You guys…”
He was about to speak but was grabbed by the neck by Lu Jing and pulled back inside.
“Hey, hey, hey!”
“They like watching the scenery from the roof, so just let them be!” Lu Jing dragged Lou Jiang and pushed him down at a table. “Come, come, drink up, drink up.”
For a moment, Lou Jiang was taken aback by his “host playing the guest” demeanor. He subconsciously picked up a wine cup and took two sips, only to spit it right out.
“Who drinks this stuff? Is this drinking a knife or swallowing fire!”
“Is it that strong?” Lu Jing lifted the lid of the jade pot and sniffed, then tried a sip himself. “I saw Young Master Chou drinking it like it was water… Crap, water, water!”
Chou Bodeng sat on the ridge, listening to the conversation in the sea-gazing pavilion as he gazed at the Azure Sea.
He wasn’t actually looking at the scenery.
He was listening.
Listening to the song of the Wind-Vane Bronze Bird.
On all the pavilions and gate-towers of the Mountain Sea Pavilion stood a “Wind-Vane.” It was a bronze bird standing on a bronze plate, its feet gripping a thin pillar that acted as a pivot. When the wind blew, the bronze bird would move with it. At this moment, a million Wind-Vane Bronze Birds had their heads and tails raised, spinning restlessly. The sound of their bronze wings turning, combined with the sound of the wind being cut, converged into a grand, magnificent chorus.
It was like ten thousand birds singing in unison.
Within the song, black clouds pressed down upon the firmament, layer upon layer, rolling and unfurling like an inverted, raging sea.
“It’s about to rain.”
Shi Wuluo sat on a nearby descending ridge, his scarlet saber laid across his knees.
“Let it.”
Chou Bodeng was half-draped over the smooth curve of the jeweled finial, watching the Wind-Vane Bird spin without rest. The sun had been completely blocked, yet the space between heaven and earth was filled with a faint, ethereal light that made his features appear half-bright, half-dark.
“It’s about time it rained.”
As if to confirm his words, raindrops began to fall from the sky, large drops that made dark round marks on the gray tiles. The rain was driven by the wind, pouring down in sheets over the houses. A gray figure approached rapidly through the rain, stopping not far from them.
The newcomer cleared his throat twice.
Chou Bodeng lazily turned his head. “What can I do for you, Elder Tao?”
“Elder Jun asked me to deliver the Taiyi Sword to you.”
Elder Tao Rong raised the sword box he was holding a little higher.
“It’s repaired? So quickly?” Chou Bodeng finally sat up straight. Too lazy to go down, he simply reached out a hand and called, “Come here, you broken sword.”
The Taiyi Sword didn’t move an inch.
Chou Bodeng raised an eyebrow. “Repaired, and your self-esteem is back, huh? Fine. Taiyi! Come here!”
The Taiyi Sword came at his call.
Elder Tao Rong, who had respectfully carried the Taiyi Sword all the way here: …
What was the difference between “broken sword, come here” and “Taiyi, come here”? As the number one famous sword under heaven, was your self-esteem, Taiyi Sword, so easily satisfied?
Elder Tao Rong was speechless. He decided to look away, and his gaze fell on the umbrella-holding person next to Chou Bodeng. After a moment’s thought, he clasped his hands in a salute. “May I speak with you alone, sir?”
Shi Wuluo glanced at him.
“I’ll go see what trouble Fatty Zuo and the others are up to.” Chou Bodeng pressed a hand on his shoulder. “You two talk.”
He didn’t wait for Shi Wuluo to reply and went straight back into the pavilion.
Shi Wuluo closed his umbrella and stood up.
Through the heavy curtain of rain, Elder Tao Rong felt him watching with a cold gaze. It was like being pointed at by the edge of a blade, a chill filled with grim hostility and killing intent. In this world, only Chou Bodeng would think he was a young man who was easily flustered. Or rather, he only acted like a living person in front of Chou Bodeng.
Otherwise, he was a saber, a saber that, for some unknown reason, held hostility and killing intent towards everyone.
“I remember you,” Shi Wuluo said. “You’ve been to the real Undying City, seen the Myriad Races Cauldron, and been to the Southern Borderlands.”
“To be remembered by you is my honor, but this is not the place to talk,” Elder Tao Rong said, suppressing his instinctive chill and bowing slightly. “This way, please, sir.”
The rain gradually grew heavier, shrouding Zhunan in gloom.
The sea horn stopped, but the chime bells began to ring.
***
When Chou Bodeng entered the sea-gazing pavilion, he heard Zuo Yuesheng’s booming voice cursing his father, starting from how he was a skinflint who wouldn’t even give him a single copper coin for change, and digging up old grievances all the way back to when he accidentally broke his mother’s bronze mirror and was made to take the blame. He cursed with great passion and brilliant phrasing.
Lu Jing poured him wine while adding fuel to the fire. “What your father did was truly inhuman.”
“Exactly!” Zuo Yuesheng slammed the table with a thunderous noise. “Does he really think he’s some upright gentleman? Bah, he’s no good thing himself, yet he has the nerve to criticize me for growing up crooked! If I weren’t counting on inheriting his private treasury, do you think I’d be willing to call him ‘Dad’?!”
“A father’s love is like a landslide, a son’s filial piety like a torrential downpour,” Chou Bodeng commented.
Zuo Yuesheng, finding Lu Jing’s pouring too slow, snatched the wine pot, drained it in one go, and slammed it back on the table with a thud. “He’s two-faced. At night, he complains to my mother, cursing a bunch of old, shriveled, bitter-faced fossils to high heaven. But when he sees them during the day, he puts on a fake smile, clasps his hands, and calls them ‘junior’ and ‘nephew’ this and that. If he wants to be a junior, then let him be one! But he wants me to call that bunch of old fossils ‘grandpa’ too. The grass on my real grandpa’s grave is three meters high; do they want to go keep my grandpa company?”
Lou Jiang’s eyes twitched as he listened. He thought that if the Young Pavilion Master’s words got out, news of “internal strife in the Mountain Sea Pavilion” would be heard the very next day.
“My dad is different from yours, but it feels about the same,” Lu Jing said with a look of deep empathy. “He can go be his saint; why should he care if I’m a scoundrel.”
Based on his status as a crony, Chou Bodeng felt he should also chime in with something supportive.
Unfortunately, he searched his memories from both his lives, and the parts about his parents were scarce… alright, they were basically non-existent. And his other elders all seemed to be completely doting on him, spoiling him to an outrageous degree. He figured saying any of that wouldn’t be of any comfort to the indignant, rebellious fatty. So, he could only pour wine for him.
“And that kid, Ying Yuqiao, just because he has an old fossil for a grandfather and a tiny bit of cultivation talent, he acts so arrogant, like his eyes are on the top of his head. My dad actually wanted me to call him Senior Brother Ying. Senior brother my ass, I’d rather be his grand-uncle!” Zuo Yuesheng slapped his thigh, sending ripples through his layers of flesh. “That punk even brought people to block me once, saying ‘I’d like to ask the Young Pavilion Master for some pointers.’ He’s at the Soul-Fixing Stage, and I’m at the Mind Illumination Stage. Isn’t he just looking for an excuse to beat me up? I’d have to be crazy to ask him for pointers!”
“How insidious!” Lu Jing berated. “This Ying fellow is clearly full of black-hearted schemes. He’s obviously trying to make you lose face. How can you tolerate that? Get someone to beat him up!”
“I wanted to find someone to beat him up too, but Lou Jiang hadn’t joined the Mountain Sea Pavilion back then, and that punk was arguably the number one of the younger generation in the Mountain Sea Pavilion…” Zuo Yuesheng sighed with regret. “So I had to bribe the girls on Red Railing Street to swap his clothes when he was spending the night.”
Chou Bodeng let out an “eh?” and asked curiously, “What did you swap his clothes for? Did you put fleas in them?”
“Putting fleas is too tame,” Zuo Yuesheng said with utter disdain. “I heard there’s a type of cloth called ‘Night Velvet’ that, if it encounters a thunderstorm, will ‘swoosh’ and burn to a crisp. So I went and found this cloth and had a dozen outfits made for him in the style he usually wears. In Zhunan, you can basically guess when it will rain and when there will be thunder with near certainty. Hehe, and then, on a certain stormy day, everyone clearly saw Young Master Ying Yuqiao streaking naked in the street… Ha! That ass of his was quite white.”
Chou Bodeng and Lu Jing were silent for a moment.
“You’re truly one of a kind, Classmate Fatty,” Chou Bodeng said, patting his shoulder. “Full of brilliant schemes and resourcefulness.”
Such a vulgar and insidious form of revenge, most people really couldn’t think of it.
Lu Jing was also filled with solemn respect and completely gave up the idea of usurping a spot among the “Four Pests of the Immortal Sects.” Compared to this damn fatty, he was as harmless as a little lamb!
The fatty who crushed the little lamb wasn’t smug for long before he started sighing again. “And then I got a real good thrashing from the old man. If my mom hadn’t stopped him, he would have even thrown me over to Taiyi for an ‘exchange.’ Damn it, is that Taiyi place fit for humans?”
“Classmate Zuo Yueban, given that the Martial Ancestor of the place not fit for humans is sitting right in front of you, you might want to choose your words more carefully,” Chou Bodeng reminded him.
Zuo Yuesheng raised his hands in surrender. “My mistake! It’s that Taiyi is too progressive, filled with a righteous atmosphere. A piece of mud like me that can’t be plastered onto a wall shouldn’t go and ruin the feng shui of Taiyi’s precious land.”
“Truly shameless…” Lu Jing muttered.
“But even mud has aspirations, you know!” Zuo Yuesheng slammed his hands on the table and stood up majestically. “No matter how much of a mud-pie I am, I’m still the Young Pavilion Master of the Mountain Sea Pavilion, okay?! Can’t this Young Pavilion Master have a moment of heroism? I was very seriously questioning him, as the Pavilion Master, how he’s managing the sect, how he let a ghastly thing like the Azure Batfish appear in the Tranquil Sea! He dismissed me like a three-year-old child. It’s one thing for him to never tell me anything, but he even sent… sent a decrepit old man to watch over me, terrified I’d run out and cause trouble for him. Can’t I do something good for a change?!”
Lou Jiang sighed outside, thinking, If it weren’t for you always causing trouble, why would the Pavilion Master’s first reaction to any news about you be to wonder what mess he has to clean up now? However, this time, the Pavilion Master telling Zuo Yuesheng to stay in the Wuye Pavilion and not go out might not have been because he was worried he would cause trouble while everyone was swamped.
The scions in the inner room vividly demonstrated what it meant to “side with family over reason” and “stand with your cronies regardless of right or wrong.”
Not only did they denounce the great Pavilion Master Zuo’s crimes one after another, but they also enthusiastically offered Zuo Yuesheng all sorts of rotten ideas to get back at his father. Lou Jiang listened with a pounding heart, feeling that if this situation continued, Pavilion Master Zuo’s future days would be anything but peaceful.
After a barrage of “grand pronouncements” about what he would do to his father in the future, Zuo Yuesheng collapsed onto the table with a thud.
His alcohol tolerance was exceptional, but Chou Bodeng’s wine was potent enough. After a few pots, he had been running entirely on a belly full of anger. Now that the anger had dissipated, so had he.
“Fatty Zuo, Fatty Zuo.” Lu Jing poked him with the handle of his fan. “Really drunk?”
Zuo Yuesheng impatiently swatted his hand away, turned his head on the table, and mumbled, “…Day in and day out, it’s like I’m something that can’t be seen in public… You don’t like me, well I don’t like you either…”
He was usually carefree, shameless, and without a conscience. It was only at this moment that he accidentally revealed the aggrieved and dissatisfied side of a son, a child.
Lu Jing turned to Chou Bodeng and mouthed: Looks like he’s really drunk.
Chou Bodeng nodded.
“It’s not easy for the damn fatty either,” Lu Jing said. Too lazy to find a blanket, he pulled down a window curtain and covered Zuo Yuesheng’s head with it, shaking his own head in lament. “Although my dad and I don’t get along either, I’m not the Young Valley Master. He’s a Young Pavilion Master, for goodness’ sake, getting tossed around all the time…”
“Can’t be helped,” Chou Bodeng said, rummaging around and finding a jar of wine that hadn’t been ravaged by Zuo Yuesheng. “The Zuo family only has one heir per generation.”
“He’s worse off than me. I can just be a profligate who does nothing but eat and wait for death.” Lu Jing sympathized for a moment, then turned his attention to other matters. “So the fatty is basically grounded for the next few days… Do we have to stay here with him? The thought of having that nagging old mother Lou around 24/7 is enough to make one lose the will to live.”
“First, I am not an old mother. Second, if I have to stay here with you, I’d be the one losing the will to live.”
The screen separating the inner and outer rooms was pulled aside.
Old Mother Lou… oh, no, Lou Jiang stood at the entrance, holding up a message he had just received.
“And, the Pavilion Master has sent a message, telling the Young Pavilion Master to immediately proceed to the Mountain Sea Grand Hall to attend the Pavilion meeting.”
The inner room was silent for a moment.
Lu Jing jumped up, frantically pulling the curtain off Zuo Yuesheng’s head. Chou Bodeng kicked a stool away, “physically” forcing Zuo Yuesheng up, while turning to tell Monk Budu to come over and give the damn fatty a sobering round of the Yan Hua Sutra. Half-Diviner came over, volunteering to divine Zuo Yuesheng’s fortune, but Monk Budu clamped a hand over his jinxed mouth.
People were stumbling, and the table was overturned.
“Is my fucking dad crazy?! Why is he making me attend some Pavilion meeting!”
Zuo Yuesheng, who had just been complaining that his father thought he was an embarrassment, now looked like the sky was falling.
“It’s a meeting to discuss the life and death and thousand-year development of the Mountain Sea Pavilion! What can I do there? Take minutes for them? My handwriting isn’t good enough for that… What the hell! All the Grand Elders will be there! They’re all influential figures!”
“What are you scared of!” Chou Bodeng scolded. “You’re the dignified Young Pavilion Master of the Mountain Sea Pavilion, one of the Four Pests of the Immortal Sects. Are you not a figure? Lu Jing! Monk! Go get him looking presentable!”
Lu Jing and Monk Budu grabbed him from either side and dragged him into the side room.
Chou Bodeng spun around, found a brush, dipped it in ink, and, unable to find paper, tore a small piece from the gauze curtain Lu Jing had pulled down and quickly wrote with flowing strokes.
“…The Pavilion Master also said, for the Young Pavilion Master to be as simple and low-key as possible…” The half of Lou Jiang’s message that he hadn’t finished conveying was drowned out by the noisy clamor.
“This outfit should work! White, like a graceful young master!”
“No, no, white is too plain! For a debut appearance, you have to dress imposingly!”
“Gently! Lu Shiyi, are you trying to squeeze my intestines out?!”
“Bear with it! You’re too fat! The belt won’t fasten! Bald donkey, come give me a hand!”
“Oww!!”
“…”
Lou Jiang stood dumbfounded at the door, completely ignored.
“Clang, clang, clang—”
Lu Jing pulled open the door to the side room, and with Monk Budu, they pushed out the majestic Young Pavilion Master Zuo Yuesheng from either side. His deep black robes were embroidered with dancing dragons and phoenixes. A flick of his left sleeve revealed a glaring Kui Dragon; a shake of his right, a crowing fire phoenix. He wore a sky-facing crown, a golden belt, and white jade boots.
He was the very picture of a wealthy and powerful…
Bandit lord!
With a wolf-fang club in hand, he could roar: “This road I opened, this tree I planted. If you wish to pass, leave your life-buying toll!”
Lou Jiang was dumbfounded.
He wanted to speak, but no one paid him any attention.
Lu Jing clapped to clear the way, Monk Budu cheered mightily, and Half-Diviner followed closely, holding up the hem of his robe. Finally, Chou Bodeng rolled up the curtain cloth covered in dense writing, stuffed it into Zuo Yuesheng’s arms, and slapped him on the back.
—He slapped him right out of the sea-gazing pavilion.
“If anyone gives you the evil eye, just write down their name,” Chou Bodeng said, arms crossed, leaning lazily against the doorway. “We’ll make sure they’re dead later.”
“Right, remember to stick your chest out and suck in your gut! Don’t let the belt snap!” Lu Jing shouted as a reminder. “And when you’re going up and down the stairs, don’t chip the jade on your boots!”
Monk Budu held up a hastily written banner. First, the front, with six large characters splashed in ink:
Total Reward Five Hundred!
Then, the back, with six sprawling characters:
Young Pavilion Master Zuo Must Win!
Zuo Yuesheng took a deep breath, clutched the cloth strip Chou Bodeng had stuffed into his hands, hitched up the golden belt Lu Jing had barely managed to fasten, and with an arrogant swagger, resolutely marched onto the battlefield.
Behind him were the “impassioned” send-off cries of his cronies:
“Go! Go show them the majesty of the Young Pavilion Master! Go wreak havoc in your capacity as Young Pavilion Master! Go tear the faces off those old men! Stomp on them a couple of times, and then spit on them for good measure!”